Are you ready for change?
Posted on 24th March 2021
Getting yourself prepared for your journey to being a true Rebel of your mental health (in a mindful way of course).
Are you ready?
How do you know you are ready?
Are you sick and tired enough of being sick and tired?
Do you have a motivator?
Perhaps you look at that person next door and see them happy, or perhaps you look at other people living lives that are seemingly ok and they seem to just ‘float’ through life? This makes you initially envious but then hey, wake up call! You can sit in your self pity and envy or YOU can do something about it. Perhaps you have just reached a point in your life where you can not go on anymore as you are? It is not going to be easy so this is why I ask you, are you truly ready?
Are you ready to feel like s*** some days but still push through? Are you ready to accept compliments from others? Are you ready to push to the side self doubt and that nasty voice on your shoulder saying ‘you do not deserve this’- heck you do!!! Are you ready to push aside that voice that says your old ways were better?
Perhaps you have thought about the legacy that you want to leave behind?
Do you want to be seen as someone who overcame adversity, do you want to be like Victor Frankl who survived concentration camp, or Nelson Mandela who was imprisoned for years but still found a positive mindset? This may seem impossible but your legacy can be a good motivator. Think about it. How do you want to be remembered by your family, friends and those who loved you? Or perhaps even those who did not love you?
On the note of family perhaps you have children that you want to do this for? You want to set an example, you want to change the script in your family of poor mental health, dysfunction or repetitive unhealthy behaviours.
All of this might seem quite challenging but we do need a good reason to change because essentially the brain resists change at all times.
I often find myself talking about the brain as if it is another person. I have always found this a useful way to explain things. After all our brains are like computers, they churn out what we give them. Your brain is resistant to change because not changing things is comfortable and ‘safe’.
With many of my clients we do a ‘costs of change’ analysis, so we get a sheet of paper, divide it into four parts and put these questions in the four boxes. What are the benefits of your position now, what are the costs of your position? What are the benefits of change and what are the costs of change?
You can download one we have already made for you here
Here are some of the things that people come up with for the costs of change..
sadness, fear, having to be vulnerable, struggle, pain, boredom, loss of family/friends, anger, having to face the unknown, not in control, the list goes on.
What are your costs of change? There will be some.
You need to do this preparation work, because some days you are going to want to give up. But rebels disregard the ‘norm’ and do something different so you are going to keep going. On the harder days it is going to seem like your old ways were easier, going to bed for the day, avoiding social contact, not going out the house, not speaking to anyone, not exercising, eating crap food or denying your feelings. All of this will seem more attractive to you at times. But you need to remember your long term goals.
Just a note here on the inner critic. Now the inner critic may jump all over a bad day and tell you how badly you are doing, that you are not worthy of feeling better or what a failure you are for even thinking of not taking care of your mental health for a day. IGNORE that inner critic. She/he is telling you lies. Your inner critic teams up with that part of your brain that tells you change is a dangerous thing. If you have a bad day or two or three it’s ok. You have made progress already by getting this far and even reading this blog.
Things to get for your Rebel’s journey of mental health recovery.
Get a notebook and write down how you are feeling morning, afternoon and evening. Start to write down the things that you appreciate in your life, e.g sunshine, diet coke, chocolate, your partner, your home, literally anything that you appreciate. Keep it simple. This is all you need to do for now.
Other useful items but you do not have to get these yet…
A puppy, not essential for all, for others it may be a garden or a few plants or even some colouring books or crafting kits.
Someone to help you declutter your home
Good healthy food
Someone who knows and can support you with what you are doing and supports you working on your mental health.
If any of this resonates with you and you would like to get some help kick starting your change then book a call with me here. We can explore how I can help you.
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